How to Act Appropriately in a Catholic Church

A STARTING PLACE

Even before the celebration itself, it is commendable that silence be observed in the church, in the sacristy, in the vesting room, and in adjacent areas, so that all may dispose themselves to carry out the sacred action in a devout and fitting manner (GIRM 45).

A sober place to open this topic. Key to getting started is that phrase ‘so that all may dispose themselves to carry out the sacred action in a devout and fitting manner.’ This presupposes that ‘all’ are there to carry out the action that the liturgy presents, that all are ‘devout’ and they have an idea of what a ‘fitting manner’ is. But we can no longer take this for granted. In this pluralistic country, even in such things as when to stand and sit, the priest will need to give directions, especially for people in the front pews at first communion, weddings or funerals!

There has been a dramatic change over the years in what people do when they enter a church. Reverent silence frequently gives way to a vocal, chatty atmosphere. I wonder if a ‘cause’ of this change (perhaps a subconscious reason) is that previously people said nothing in the liturgy, with the dialogue limited to the priest and server. Silent spectators were suddenly very involved in speaking prayer out loud... so we talk!

I saw on a website: the first thing you need to do when you enter a Catholic church is ‘to shut up’! Crudely put, but to the point, and often not followed these days. Tourists are confronted with signs like SILENCE: this is a place of prayer as they enter historic churches, and are sometimes forbidden entry if they are wearing shorts or have their shoulders uncovered.

OUR PLURALISTIC SOCIETY

Recognising that the ‘sacred action’ of the liturgy is not just Sunday Mass but also the celebration of funerals, marriage, baptism, confirmation, first communion, we might ask ourselves: How do people prepare themselves to take part in these rites and what does the ceremony require of them, especially if they are not Catholic? Can we ever supply ‘guidelines for acting appropriately in a Catholic church’?

The problem is that guidelines boil down to a subjective interpretation and judgment on a rule. For example, what do you wear to Mass? How do people judge what is appropriate? We are a far cry from my youth when people wore ‘Sunday Best’: suit and tie for men and dresses, hat and gloves for women. I remember one hot Sunday afternoon a young woman came to Mass at our seaside parish in a bikini. After Mass there was a knock on the sacristy door and there she was. She apologised and said her clothes and towel were stolen at the beach. She had the choice of not coming to Mass or being embarrassed by attending. She chose to come (but did not come to communion). Did she make the right choice? I accepted her apology, gave her communion in the sacristy and shared her apologies with the congregation the following Sunday.

LEGISLATING FOR THE ‘APPROPRIATE’?

Appropriate behaviour covers things like talking in church, mobile phones, coming on time and leaving early, forms of participation, considering others, behaviour of children, welcoming the stranger, receiving Communion reverently. Some of this is simply about good manners and some of it is about being enculturated into the action of the liturgy, that is, knowing what is expected and how to act together as a People. How I act is not dictated by my individual needs. Do the dynamic of the liturgy and the communal action of the people allow me to text whilst others start going to communion?

How can we ‘legislate’ for what is ‘appropriate’? I once knew a parish priest who thought coming to Mass late and leaving early was just plain bad manners so he used to lock the church door. Yet clearly this does not take into account the parents who weathered the storm of getting their four children ready almost on time. It may be a real act of sacrificial love on their behalf if you were to sit at the front, allowing beleaguered late comers to have a seat in the back instead of standing or sheepishly trying to coax their family to the front seats. Can we turn an act of exclusion into a gesture of hospitality? I suspect we can shape people’s behaviour in the church by focusing on how people enter and leave, and then trying to understand what it is that we have come to.

THE DOOR OF THE CHURCH – THE LIMINAL PLACE

The church door speaks of a welcoming and inclusive hospitality. It is an invitation to enter. Yet the door and the foyer is also a zone of transition, a doorstep from the world to a sacred place of meeting, a threshold from the dust of the streets to a place for reflection and prayer. This is beautifully expressed in the cathedral at Chartres in France. The doors are set in arches of carved figures of Christ and the saints. They invite you to see yourself entering into a space where we live as a Communion of Saints, the Body of Christ. We are entering the ‘womb’, the place where we are reborn to eternal life. Reminded and empowered by the liturgy we will ‘issue forth’, reborn with a purpose to glorify the Lord by our lives.

We are indeed entering into a meeting place; we begin with the social norm of greeting , chatting, passing the time of day, talking about the weather or our health. Then the door, and the action of entering through it, lead us to something else.

TAKING HOLY WATER CONSCIOUSLY, SERIOUSLY

The symbol of the holy water stoup catches us into this ‘something else’. A person entering the church dips their hand into the holy water and makes a Sign of the Cross over their body. It may be easier to focus on a concrete gesture than teach an abstract theology. The gesture itself is a powerful reminder that the baptised have ‘put on Christ’ and, as we gather, brothers and sisters forming the Body of Christ, we enter into communion with the mystery of his dying and rising in the liturgy. We ask you, Father, with your Son to send the Holy Spirit upon the waters of this font. May all who are buried with Christ in the death of baptism rise also with him to newness of life. This is how we bless the water to make it ‘holy’ and the blessing we invoke upon those who use it. It is the baptised who gather. How aware are we of our status as ‘the baptised’ who meet with Christ and become the Body of Christ in sacramental life?

MEETING CHRIST

Why have we come? Are we at liturgy to meet Christ and, if so, how do we meet him? It is in ‘doing’ the liturgy – over many Sundays, many seasons and festivals, many weddings and initiations and anointings and funerals – that Christ’s own spirit seeps into us. We listen in faith to the early witnesses, we offer an exchange of gifts through bread and wine. It is in the ‘doing’ of liturgy, attending to and joining in its action, focusing on its meaning, that we resolve the disturbances of inappropriate behaviour.

Our need is to form awareness of the meaning of the gathering of the baptised. It is more than being a circle of friends: it is becoming the Body of Christ, it is an encounter with Christ and the Holy Spirit leading us to our Creator. Such formation might help people ‘interpret’ what is appropriate in things like dress, silence, handling exuberant children, use of our instruments of social media, and so forth. With a good understanding, all may dispose themselves to carry out the sacred action in a devout and fitting manner (GIRM 45).

Louis Marie Chauvet, a French teacher on sacramental life, says that in liturgy people can have what they want but each element has its appropriate place. So there is a place for talking and welcoming the stranger. There is a place and time for quiet, for reflection. There are times for formal dress or for informal dress. And there are some things that do not fit into liturgy like mobiles, texting, pagers.

BLESSING AND SENDING FORTH

We have so far concentrated on how people arrive and become part of the liturgical action. Another aspect is the dynamic of the ending of the Mass. If someone goes to communion and then leaves, it could be seen as ‘receiving communion without participating in the mission of Christ.’ The brief announcements indicate what the community is doing by way of faith action. They invite us to take part in the mission of Christ. It may be a simple thing like a cake stall to help fund a women’s shelter or a collection of cans of soup for the work of Vinnies. If we do not hear these invitations it may diminish our part with the mission of Jesus in our time and place.

In the blessing and the dismissal, the people of God, the baptised, are blessed by God and sent forth with a purpose: Go and announce the Gospel of the Lord or Go in peace, glorifying the Lord by your life. As the signing of the cross with holy water at the beginning of Mass marks a transition into the sacred, so now to hear and bow before the blessing and to enter the action of the dismissal is a transition back to the world of the mobile phone. But we go back transformed: we have entered the realm of thanksgiving, we have listened to the word encouraging, nourishing us, and we have been blessed and broken on the altar with Christ who offered himself for the life of the world.

WHAT TO DO?

Approaches that invite people to deeper awareness will be the most effective way to ensure that all may dispose themselves to carry out the sacred action in a devout and fitting manner (GIRM 45).

Would it be good...

▪ if, a couple of minutes before the start of Mass, the commentator invited the congregation to prayerful stillness, to become mindful of being in the House of God?

▪ if we made more of the silent times after the readings and after communion (stillness in place of singing)?

▪ (this is a long shot) if we tried to recover the ministry of usher to get people to the front (ushers were needed in the 1950s because the churches were so full – they made space and directed people to it.)?

▪ (alternatively) if the welcome minister invited people with children to sit towards the front so they can see the action of the Mass?

▪ if, by means of a notice on the door or on a screen, we invited people to turn off their mobile phones?

▪ if we suggested to parents that they leave the children’s toys and snacks at home and bring instead a prayer book or children’s missal and help them see and follow the action of the Mass (no need to be at the back door ready to deal with some distress)?

 if people were invited to ‘ownership’ of the church by putting the hymnal back where it came from, picking up used tissues, newsletters and other items?

▪ if the liturgical ministers met in the sacristy beforehand for a moment of quiet and a brief prayer of preparation before taking their place in the assembly?

▪ if the preaching opened up some of the symbols, for example, the door as the threshold to a sacred place of meeting God or the signing with the holy water as our baptismal belonging to the communion of the Body of Christ (communio not just community)?

▪ if we tried to deal with things that distract us as they arise by naming them and seeking a solution (often common sense will prevail)?

‍

​We go forward in hope!

This article was originally published in Liturgy News ​Vol 44(3) September 2014. Reprinted with permission.

‍